Elusive Underpants

I finally got my act together aroud 11:30 this moring and decided it was time for Jacob to take off his overnight pull-up and get dressed. After Jacob slithered out of his pajama pants, I sent him to his room to get some clean underwear.

Two minutes later, he comes back into the living room, bare butt exposed, carrying a broken clothes hanger.

"Jacob, where's your underwear?"

"Mommy, look. I found a treasure. It has a hook!"

"Jacob, go to your room and get your underwear on!"

He sighes heavily and disappears again. I don't hear from him for a while so I call down the hallway, "Jacob, what are you doing?" In response, he bounds out of his room with his favorite Disney Cars toy. He stands in front of me as naked as a newborn.

"JACOB. Where did your shirt go? Go get your underwear on now!"

"Oh yeah, I forgot." He says cheerfully as he skips away once again.

Not more than a minute later, there is a noise coming from the bathroom. I recognize the sound of his electronic Spiderman toothbrush whirring away. "JACOB! UNDERWEAR! NOW!" His little feet patter back into his room.

He finally comes out of his room, slowly balancing a pair of underwear on the hook of the broken clothes hanger. He dangles it proudly in front of me like it was the largest catch of the day.

"Thank you, now please put them on." I sigh, relieved. I look away for a second to put Ryan in his baby swing. When I turn around, I see Jacob, finally wearing some underwear.  But they're inside out. How do I know they're inside out? On his rear, I can see nearly fresh skid marks.

"Jacob, where did you get this underwear?"

"In my laundry basket."

"Are those the ones you wore yesterday?"

"Yeah! They are my favorite!"

"UGH!" I say, defeated,

"HEEEEEEEE!" He hisses back at me.