Baby Labor

Lately, Ryan's been asking us for an allowance. You know, to support his gangster lifestyle:

But it didn't take long to discover that Ryan is just too young to earn his allowance. Despite his best efforts, Ryan wasn't able to clean out the cat box, plunge the toilet, or clear out the gutters. In fact, he was pretty darn useless.

So, desperate, Ryan took his plight to the streets.

First he tried to emphasize his work ethic.

Then he tried pandering to the emotions of his passerbys (turns out we live on a pretty heartless street).

When these attempts failed, he figured he had nothing to lose by sticking with the truth:

I mean, what's the world coming to when a BABY can't even get a bottle....of Jim Bean?!